Late Entry | Three Sheets Northwest

Fitness and the Cruiser

by Scott Wilson on 10/08/10 at 4:38 pm

If you are hoping that this is a how-to article on the topic, stop reading now; I plan first to lament my own deplorable state of flabbiness and then speculate idly and without authority on the road that has lead me here, the eminent obstacles denying other avenues, and approaches a more disciplined man might have taken. Treated as a how-to guide, this post will only serve to lead you, too, into a state of abject decrepitude, barely able to push your engine start button or lift a beer bottle unassisted.

As strenuous as sailing often feels, it in fact seems to have done little for my overall state of physical fitness. This could be predicted; a boat, after all, has little room for the standard tools of physical self-improvement. When we moved aboard, one of the things I missed most was my weight set.

Standard and dependable self-resistance alternatives to free weights have long existed, of course; just ask Charles Atlas. But another thing that a boat is lacking is room. There are two spots where I can do situps, although I don’t, at least not often enough. There is no single place flat enough and wide enough on board for me to do a regular, full push-up.

I had originally imagined that this dearth of conventionally oriented exercise would be replaced by the strenuous life of a sailing man, but it turns out it’s not all that strenuous. Sure, I haul on sheets and halyards all day, sometimes fight the rudder, row the dinghy, and pull up the anchor by hand… but while it all sounds very masculine and muscle-building, in fact none of it is all that hard. And most of it is done while sitting on one’s gluteus maximus, which doesn’t receive much of a work-out either.

The unfair part of all this is that the body, so fooled by all the apparent activity, develops a massive hunger, and combined with the easy access to snacks, the long days just sitting around waiting to get somewhere, this means that it gets fed… a lot. Sleeping in is also common, as the body is equally deceived that it has become dog tired even though it’s just been reclining in a moderately comfortable seat all day.

My wife claims that this is all down to adrenaline, and I’m burning more calories than I realize. There may be something to the adrenaline thing; there is a lot of stress and a surprising amount of thinking required to get through a rough sailing day. But calorie burn, I’m just not seeing. I feel weaker than when I came aboard a year ago, pudgier than the powerboaters across the way (if you think sailing is easy, go run a stinkpot for a few days).

But take heart, all is not dim. The problem has been noted, and is being addressed, by Seattle boaters Myles and Lisa Magnuson. Their business, Onboard Fitness, purports to solve all that with personalized workouts developed for your boat size and your own, well, size.

Report back after trying all this, you say? Oh, no, my friends, that’s not for me. I’m too busy trying to, ah, hoist up this tortilla chip, loaded down as it is with chunky salsa. But if any of you want to try it and let me know how it goes, I’m all ears. Maybe it will be inspiring. Or maybe I’ll just have some more chips.